Over the past week, I have been spending time each day studying different attributes of God. Today, I meditated on God’s goodness.

“I will praise you forever for what you have done; in your name I will hope, for your name is good.” -Psalm 52:9

This stuck with me throughout the day almost as if it was preparing me for the email I would receive late this afternoon. The email from my adoption agency stating that the Ministry of Gender and Family Promotion is expected to stop accepting new dossiers after August 31st as they have signed the Hague Treaty and are restructuring their adoption processes.

Our dossier was expected to make it to Rwanda a week or two after that. Unfortunate timing, indeed.

I wasted no time in calling my caseworker and the Rwandan Embassy. Essentially, it’s not looking good, but we’re going to hold tight until next week to see what goes down. I had a nice ugly cry for about ten minutes and have since calmed down enough to come to these understandings:
1. God is good.
2. If we cannot adopt from Rwanda, we will transfer to the Ethiopia program. We will have to re-do some of our paperwork, but it would be doable.
3. It is so stinkin hard to let God be God sometimes. But I choose to believe that He is in control of all things and that He knows who and where our little boy is.

Honestly, I feel so completely volatile right now as I sit and do nothing, waiting to see if our Rwandan adoption is still a possibility or if we’re about to take a giant leap backwards to put together a brand new dossier. Pray for us and for the sweet Rwandan children waiting for families.

“For the Lord is good and his love endures forever; his faithfulness continues through all generations.” -Psalm 100:5